Do I have ADHD? 7 Critical Steps To Your Answer

Even 25% of adults suspect they have ADHD.

You might be asking yourself, ‘Do I have ADHD?’.

If you’ve been told you’re “just being dramatic” or that you need to “try harder,” you’re not alone.

As I’m starting my AuDHD diagnosis, I thought this post was absolutely a must. I’ve been there too. Believing for years that my struggles with focus, organization, and overwhelm confirmed I was broken. It turns out they are something more.

Getting an ADHD diagnosis can feel overwhelming. Especially when your suspicions have been dismissed before.

But here’s what I wish someone had told me earlier: there’s a clear, scientific process to get the answers you deserve.

Whether you’re just starting to suspect you might be neurodivergent or you’ve been advocating for yourself for years, this guide will walk you through every step.

Before we dive into the diagnosis process, make sure you’re equipped with the right tools to support yourself through this journey.

Check out this comprehensive ADHD mental health toolkit for resources that can help you manage symptoms while you’re seeking answers.

Ready to take control of your mental health journey? Let’s break down exactly what to expect.

Step 1: Recognize Your ADHD Symptoms and Patterns

So, you think you might have ADHD? Trust me, I get it. For years, I thought I was just a hot mess who couldn’t get her life together. But because my symptoms never checked out with the stereotypical ADHDer, I never put two and two together.

How Is Adult ADHD Presentation Special?

Here’s the thing about adult ADHD symptoms – they don’t look like the hyperactive kid bouncing off classroom walls. When I was struggling, I had no idea that my constant brain fog and inability to finish projects were actually signs of inattentive ADHD.

Inattentive symptoms hit differently as an adult. Maybe you’re the person who starts ten projects but never finishes any of them. Or you zone out during important meetings, even when you’re trying your hardest to pay attention. I used to think I was just lazy when I’d spend hours “working” but accomplish basically nothing.

Hyperactive-impulsive symptoms can be sneaky, too. Instead of running around, you might feel restless inside your own skin.

I always struggled to let people finish when I already knew where they were going. For years, it wasn’t a problem, for battling depression meant being on multiple meds at the same time. I was properly numb and effectively sedated. My sarcastic comments didn’t happen that often.

The moment I started getting off meds, my brain became sharper. But also merciless. I often realize I blurt out stuff I don’t want to once it’s too late.

Plus, impulsive purchases left me broke and confused about my own behaviour. The ironic bit? I never wasted much on clothes, entertainment, etc. I would invest in courses. Mainly online. I would have brilliant ideas for a career change or a new business endeavour.

The tricky part? Many of us develop what experts call ADHD masking – we create workarounds that hide our struggles. I became the queen of color-coded calendars and sticky notes, but underneath all those coping strategies, I was still drowning.

Self-Assessment and Symptom Tracking

Before you book that first appointment, do yourself a favor and start documenting everything. I wish I’d done this sooner because when you’re sitting in front of a doctor, your brain will go completely blank.

Plus, there is no way you will remember all that you want to say which is relevant to the diagnosis.

Try these symptom-tracking techniques:

• Keep a daily struggle journal. Write down when you lose focus, forget important tasks, or feel overwhelmed.

• Use free online screening tools. They’re not diagnostic, but they help you see patterns.

• Look back at your childhood. Dig up those old report cards – mine were full of “doesn’t pay attention” and “talks too much.”

• Track across different settings. Note if problems happen at work, at home, and in social situations.

Gender differences in ADHD are real, y’all. Women and girls often get missed because we tend to internalize our hyperactivity as anxiety or perfectionism.

If you’re female-presenting and relate to being called “too sensitive” or “scattered,” pay attention to that.

Step 2: Gather Your Personal and Family History

This step honestly made me want to crawl under a rock. Who wants to dig up all their past failures and family drama? But here’s why it matters – ADHD has strong genetic components, and your childhood patterns are crucial evidence.

Collecting Childhood Evidence

I had to become a detective of my own past and let me tell you; it was eye-opening. Your school records and report cards are goldmines of information. If you have them, of course.

If you don’t, try to reflect on your struggles or ‘weird’ moments.

Mine showed consistent patterns I’d never noticed before.

I love whiteboards. I love writing with markers. I was always fascinated with chalk and blackboards. The only reason I don’t have a blackboard at home is that it would be impractical.

I always struggled with the mess. When I was a little girl, I loved Barbie dolls. Once I was done playing, I was supposed to put all my toys back into the box.

That was the part that felt impossible. My mum would check on me and see that I was back to playing. Long story short, I couldn’t complete the cleaning task. You may ask, ‘But what is the problem?’. I can’t give you a definitive answer. I just don’t know how to do it.

Planning house cleaning still feels overwhelming. The same goes for cooking. That’s where my whiteboards come in handy. I love to document the entire cleaning process. Yes, I map out where to start in the kitchen and how to clean my bathroom drawers. Otherwise, it won’t happen.

That’s classic ADHD right there – struggling with routine tasks.

Family interviews can be awkward, but they’re worth it.

Ask about:

• Academic struggles or giftedness. Many ADHDers are “smart but lazy” kids.

• Emotional regulation issues. Were you the kid with big feelings?

• Organizational challenges. Lost homework, messy room, forgetting chores.

• Social difficulties. Trouble making friends or reading social cues.

One of my weirdest habits at school was how I approached tests. I’d complete them in no time because I never double-checked. It felt like the moment I got this first draft or just circled all the answers, my interest in the test evaporated. Was I losing on this strategy? Absolutely. Did it make me stop? Never.

Documenting Current Life Impact

This part hit me hard because I had to face how much ADHD was actually affecting my daily life. I’d been gaslighting myself for years, thinking everyone struggled like I did.

Your work and career challenges matter more than you think.

I can’t tell you how many dramatic career change ideas I had. Only some three years ago, I realized that what matters most to me is the mode of my job, not the job per se. But until then? I was hopping from one idea to another. Sound familiar?

Document these daily functioning issues:

• Time management disasters. Being chronically late, underestimating how long tasks take.

• Financial chaos. Impulse purchases, forgetting to pay bills, losing important documents.

• Relationship patterns. Interrupting, forgetting important dates, emotional overwhelm.

• Household management struggles. Laundry piles, dishes in the sink, clutter everywhere.

Don’t forget about mental health history, either. Depression and anxiety often tag along with ADHD.

Very important: don’t dismiss your suspicions just because some of your symptoms are the exact opposite of the typical ADHD pattern.

In my case, I am never late. I don’t think I was ever late in my life. In fact, I am always too early. Sometimes, hours too early.

But that’s related to my PTSD. I learned quite early in my life that when you’re late, you’re attracting attention in the worst possible way.

One of my leading strategies to avoid bullying (which, by the way, failed epically) was to blend in. So, aside from never being late, I’d wear clothes in plain colors that helped me fit the walls, etc. Of course, this couldn’t have worked.

The point is, in some areas, I’m the exact opposite of typical ADHD traits. But it doesn’t mean I don’t have ADHD.

Step 3: Choose the Right Healthcare Provider

Oh boy, this step can make or break your entire journey.

My main disappointment is that while I spent +20 years battling treatment-resistant depression, no specialist mentioned I was neurodivergent. Ever.

And I had been with dozens of both therapists and psychiatrists. That’s one of my biggest regrets – that I had to spot it myself. Once I did and shared it with the medical people, they were like, ‘Yup, we knew’. WTF?!

It strikes me how professionals can not realize how life-changing diagnoses can be for neurodivergent people. The relief of understanding who you are. And to finally belong somewhere.

On the other hand, I don’t hold grudges and am very pragmatic. So, I don’t waste my time calling them names or anything.

Plus, I have a very realistic and sensible approach to therapies and treatments. I encourage you to grab it for yourself.

Even the best medical professionals are still people. Your relationship with a therapist might not work out, just like any other type of relationship. It doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you. Or with the therapist.

Like in any relationship, some things are just not meant to be. You don’t vibe; they are just not for you. That’s ok. You move on and look for someone else.

You shouldn’t dread telling them – they shouldn’t take it personally. An emotionally stable person will understand that it isn’t anything you have against them. It’s the right thing to do.

So, if you tried therapy but, for some reason, it didn’t work, try again. Try until you find your match.

Types of ADHD Specialists

Not all healthcare providers are created equal when it comes to adult ADHD assessment. Your family doctor might be great for strep throat, but ADHD? That’s a different story.

Primary care physicians can diagnose ADHD, but here’s the catch – many of them don’t really get it. I once heard about one who told this woman that adults can’t have ADHD because “you outgrow it.” (Massive eye roll.)

If your GP is knowledgeable about neurodevelopmental conditions, great! If not, don’t waste your time.

Psychiatrists are often your best bet, especially if you suspect you have other mental health stuff going on, too. They can prescribe medication and understand the complex relationship between ADHD and conditions like anxiety or depression.

Psychologists can do comprehensive testing that’s super detailed. If you want the full neuropsychological workup, this might be your route. Just know they can’t prescribe meds, so you might need both a psychologist and a psychiatrist on your team.

Finding an ADHD-Informed Professional

Here’s what I wish someone had told me: not all mental health professionals understand adult ADHD.

Some still think it’s just a childhood thing or that women can’t have it. Wild, right?

Red flags to avoid:

• Dismissing your concerns immediately. If they say, “You seem fine to me” in the first five minutes, run.

• Using outdated criteria. Anyone who thinks ADHD is just hyperactive boys needs to update their education.

• Refusing to consider adult diagnosis. This is a huge red flag that they don’t understand current research.

• Making you feel rushed or judged. You deserve someone who takes your concerns seriously.

Before booking, ask these questions:

• “How many adults with ADHD do you see each month?”

• “What’s your typical assessment process?”

• “Do you use current DSM-5 criteria?”

• “What’s your experience with women/adults who mask their symptoms?”

Insurance and cost considerations are real talk. ADHD evaluations can be pricey, and not all insurance covers them fully (US). Call your insurance first to understand your benefits. Some telehealth options are more affordable and just as valid – don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

My diagnosis happens within my therapy sessions, and I’m not interested so much in receiving an official document. The diagnosis comes with a massive amount of personalized insights. They will highlight your specifics, helping address your struggles.

Step 4: Prepare for Your Initial Consultation

Ok, so you’ve found a provider who doesn’t think you’re making it all up. Now comes the prep work, and honey, this is where you can really advocate for yourself.

What to Bring to Your Appointment

I showed up to my first appointment completely unprepared and basically word-vomited my entire life story in no particular order.

Don’t be me. Be better.

Symptom documentation is your secret weapon. Remember that journal I told you to keep? Bring it. Print out your online screening results. Make a list of specific examples of how symptoms affect your daily life.

Your medical records matter more than you might think. Bring everything – previous therapy notes, medication trials, even that time you got tested for learning disabilities in college.

Collateral information from people who know you well can be game-changing. Your best friend filling out a rating scale about your behavior might be more accurate than your own self-assessment. We’re not always the best judges of our own struggles.

Advocating for Yourself During the Visit

This part terrified me because I’m not naturally confrontational. In fact, that’s an understatement.

Most of my life, I spent it scared shitless of any hint of conflict.

But here’s what I learned: you have to be your own advocate because no one else will do it for you.

How to describe your symptoms clearly took me forever to figure out.

Don’t just say, “I can’t focus.” Say, “I start projects with intense enthusiasm but abandon them 80% of the time, leaving my apartment full of half-finished crafts and my career feeling scattered.”

I noticed people are more understanding when you give them examples and context rather than using specialist terms.

Be specific about timeframes:

• “I’ve struggled with time management since elementary school.”

• “These symptoms happen daily, not just when I’m stressed.”

• “I’ve tried every productivity system out there, and nothing sticks.”

If your provider seems dismissive, don’t back down. Say, “I understand your perspective, but I’d like you to note in my chart that I’m requesting an ADHD evaluation.” Sometimes, you have to get a little formal to be taken seriously.

Bringing a support person can help if you’re comfortable with it. They can remember important details you might forget and provide emotional support. Just make sure it’s someone who’s seen your struggles firsthand.

Step 5: Complete Comprehensive ADHD Testing

Alright, here’s where things get real. Comprehensive ADHD assessment isn’t just a quick chat – it’s a deep dive into your brain and how it works. It will make you nervous as heck, but also excited to finally get some answers.

Standard Diagnostic Components

The clinical interview will be intense but so validating. Your psychologist will ask about everything – childhood behavior, current struggles, family history, relationships. They will want specifics about how your symptoms showed up in different situations.

Behavioral rating scales are eye-opening. Especially if you fill out questionnaires about your symptoms, and so does your partner. Seeing their responses can help you realize how much your ADHD is affecting your relationship in ways you hadn’t even noticed.

Cognitive testing can be kind of fun, like brain puzzles. They will test your memory, attention span, and executive function. Watching yourself struggle with tasks that should be simple can be both frustrating and illuminating.

The medical examination part will rule out other conditions that can mimic ADHD. Thyroid issues, sleep disorders, and vitamin deficiencies can all cause similar symptoms. It’s important to make sure you’re not dealing with something else entirely.

Understanding DSM-5 Criteria

Here’s where the science gets specific, and I love that because it takes away the guesswork. The DSM-5 ADHD criteria aren’t just suggestions – they’re research-based standards that clinicians use.

You need five or more symptoms from either the inattentive or hyperactive-impulsive category (or both). These can’t just be occasional things – they have to be persistent patterns that interfere with your life.

The six-month duration rule makes sense when you think about it. Everyone has off days or stressful periods. ADHD symptoms stick around regardless of what’s happening in your life.

Childhood onset evidence can be tricky if you mask well. Your evaluator will help you see that being called “spacey” and “disorganized” throughout the school can actually be evidence of inattentive symptoms.

Functional impairment means your symptoms have to actually mess with your daily life. It’s not enough to just have the symptoms – they have to cause real problems at work, in relationships, or with basic life skills.

Step 6: Navigate the Evaluation Process

This step will test your patience more than anything else. ADHD evaluation timeline isn’t a quick process, and if you’re like me and want immediate answers, that can be frustrating as hell.

Timeline and Expectations

How long diagnosis takes varies wildly. Some people get answers faster; others wait months. It depends on your provider’s schedule and how complex your case is.

Don’t expect to walk out of your first appointment with a diagnosis. Multiple appointments are normal because clinicians need time to gather all the information and rule out other possibilities.

Ruling out other conditions was actually reassuring once I understood why it was necessary. Depression can cause focus problems. Anxiety can look like hyperactivity. Sleep disorders mess with attention. Your evaluator isn’t being difficult – they’re being thorough.

It’s in your best interest to have it done right. And right can rarely equal fast.

Getting collateral input means your evaluator might want to hear from people who’ve known you long-term. Parents may be asked to fill out a childhood behaviour questionnaire, and partners will complete rating scales about your current functioning. It might feel invasive at first, but it can provide a crucial outside perspective.

Dealing with Evaluation Challenges

What if the results are inconclusive? It can feel scary. Turns out, sometimes the answer isn’t crystal clear, and that’s okok. You might have subthreshold ADHD or another neurodevelopmental difference that deserves attention.

I’m still in the middle of diagnosis. Specifically, it’s not just for ADHD but AuDHD. It means it also includes autism evaluation.

The tricky part is that I know even now, many of my traits stand in opposition to the typical ADHD or autistic traits.

For instance, autism is often associated with trouble with wordplay, innuendos, etc. Me? I thrive on banters and flourish on puns. I love analogies and figurative speech.

Neurodivergence is always a very custom thing. One person with ADHD can be the exact opposite of another. And still, both will belong to the same group.

So, don’t think too much about fitting the mould. After all, being neurodivergent means you must have lived your life avoiding the moulds of ‘normal’ for years. So, don’t you dare start adjusting now!

If something feels off about your evaluation, second opinion considerations are totally valid. I’ve heard too many stories of people being dismissed or misdiagnosed. Trust your gut if the process doesn’t feel thorough or respectful.

Insurance and documentation issues can be a nightmare. Keep copies of everything. Follow up on prior authorizations. Ask about payment plans if needed. Don’t let financial stress derail your pursuit of answers.

Step 7: Receive Your Diagnosis and Plan Next Steps

The moment of truth. Getting an ADHD diagnosis in adults can bring up so many emotions – relief, grief, excitement, and overwhelm. All of that is normal. It’s valid.

Understanding Your Results

ADHD subtypes explained will help you understand your specific flavor of neurodivergence. You might have a combined type, which means dealing with both inattentive and hyperactive-impulsive symptoms.

Severity levels matter for treatment planning. Mild severity might need different support than severe cases.

Learning about co-occurring conditions is validating. Your anxiety doesn’t have to be a separate issue – it can be largely a response to years of unmanaged ADHD symptoms. Rejection sensitivity isn’t a character weakness – it’s a common ADHD trait.

What if you don’t meet the criteria happens sometimes, and it doesn’t mean your struggles aren’t real. Subthreshold ADHD, autism spectrum traits, or other neurodevelopmental differences might explain your experiences. Keep advocating for support regardless of labels.

Labels, names, tags – they are like signs meant to direct you. But they don’t hold the ultimate meaning. Even if you don’t meet the criteria, you deserve support. Don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.

Creating Your Treatment Plan

Medication options can feel overwhelming at first. Stimulants, non-stimulants, immediate-release, extended-release – there are so many choices. Finding the right medication is often trial and error, but it’s worth the effort.

Therapy and coaching options include cognitive behavioral therapy, specifically for ADHD, which teaches practical skills for managing symptoms. ADHD coaching focuses on developing systems and strategies for daily life. Both can be incredibly helpful.

Lifestyle modifications aren’t just wellness BS – they’re evidence-based supports. Regular sleep, exercise, and stress management actually impact ADHD symptoms. I was sceptical until I experienced the difference myself, especially with food.

Workplace accommodations are your legal right under the ADA in many cases. Extended deadlines, quiet workspaces, or flexible schedules can level the playing field. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need.

Wrapping Up

‘Do I have ADHD?’. Finding the answer won’t be quick or easy. But that is for a reason. You want the right answers, not guesses.

Getting an ADHD diagnosis as an adult isn’t just about getting a label. It’s about finally having answers and accessing the support you need to thrive. The diagnosis process might feel daunting, but each step brings you closer to understanding your brain and finding strategies that actually work.

Once you have your diagnosis, self-advocacy becomes crucial. Ready to build those skills? Check out this guide on self-advocacy for neurodivergent people for the tools you need to get proper support.